anything but ordinary

Posted on by
2

i feel like such a hypocrite for saying things like i was ok and that i was doing fine without james in my past entries
because the truth is and i just realized it today- i love being around him so much. i just remembered how it felt to not care about anything and be random and it was fun. and i know it’s just a kiss but when he kissed me today i felt good and it made me miss him even more.

i know we act like nothing happened like we’re still together but there’s always this great feeling of security when you know you guys are on the same page with things. i wanna get back šŸ˜¦

i had so much fun today and this wednesday, we’re all going to bogo with friends for 2 days. i hope we patch things up- i’d hate having to celebrate my birthday without a proper boyfriend.

colon was fun. this party feels like it’s gonna be a lot of fun. oooh i’m excited.

getting there

Posted on by
2

i no longer have classes anymore and today, i stayed in bed til 11 in the morning, i took a bath in the rain and then i took a real shower! [something totally unexpected!] then i went to have my cup cakes for my party made and then i had my nails done – now they’re really pretty! šŸ™‚

i had quesadillas for snacks and candy, too.

now i’m on the pc trying to make the layout and minus one song for casey.

i did this without seeing james today and i don’t miss him at all. even if we might be getting back together, i can definitely say that i can make it on my own without him after all.

miguel is awesome! šŸ˜‰

xoxo

I’M ALMOST 18!!!

one heartbreak at a time…

Posted on by
Reply
See my days are cold without you
But I’m hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can’t take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I’m hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can’t take no more
I keep on running back to you

Baby I don’t know why ya treatin me so bad
You said you love me, no one above me
And I was all you had
And though my heart is beating for ya
I can’t stop crying
I don’t know how
I allow you to treat me this way and still i stay

See my days are cold without you
But I’m hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can’t take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I’m hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can’t take no more
I keep on running back to you

Baby I don’t know why ya wanna do me wrong
See when I’m home, I’m all alone (alone)
And you are always gone
And boy, you know I really love you (love you)
I can’t deny
I can’t see how you bring me to so many tears after all these years

See my days are cold without you
But I’m hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can’t take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I’m hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can’t take no more
I keep on running back to you
Oohhhhh
I trusted you, I trusted you
So sad, so sad
what love will make you do
all the things that we accept
be the things that we regret
too all of my ladies (ladies) feel me
c’mon sing wit me
See, when I get the strength to leave
You always tell me that you need me
And I’m weak cause I believe you
And I’m mad because I love you
So I stop and think that maybe
You can learn to appreciate me
Then it all remains the same that
You ain’t never gonna change
(never gonna change, never gonna change)
See my days are cold without you
But I’m hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can’t take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But im hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can’t take no more
I keep on running back to you

Baby why you hurt me leave me and desert me
Boy I gave you all my heart
And all you do is tear it up
Looking out my window
Knowing that I should go
Even when I pack my bags
This something always hold me back


every fucking word

“enjoy the last moments of this rel. cuz buwagan na baya tika…”

Posted on by
1

and again, issa is sad because a certain boy has yet again succeeded at making her feel like shit. just like every other time. it’s amazing, actually, how in love i am with someone who has taken complete advantage of me. and i keep thinking it but i’m too scared to say it but i will just this once, it’s not even worth it anymore.

sorry james. but i don’t even know why i go through the trouble anymore.

“Our Battles”



Our battles are repetious

if not broken poetry

and maybe that’s the attraction

that you’re as self-absorbed as me



You jumped to the conclusion

and landed on my chest

Now how am I supposed to make you see.



I’ll just write this down

with hopes that you’ll understand

I can no longer be disciplined by

the frustration of an insecure man

And as I kiss your face you’ll know that

I can no longer apologize for

your former lover’s mistakes.



My past is mine to keep

Who are you to question me…?

Perhaps someday you’ll learn

Too bad

it’s not our turn

i am currently in love with this song because it’s everything i feel right now [or maybe even for a long time already].

i’m so frustrated with this relationship because it’s always my fault even when it’s not and i wanna cry about it but i’m not allowed to, i want james to know how i feel but i know he doesn’t care. i don’t even know why we are together because it’s not fun anymore. it always hurts. it always hurts.

i had lunch with arden today and kating caught up. it felt good to be around other people aside from james because i’m so suffocated by him. it felt good to know that my friends were living good lives and having fun and not going through the mess that i am.

i told grany that she and my aunt aren’t invited to my 18th. i haven’t gotten a reply since i sent the message at 8:30 this morning.

i got a perfect score on our finals for PE. And despite being constantly bitched at james for grouping with winster, i don’t regret sticking to my group cuz it was worth it.

i miss krystle a lot.

i don’t have anyone to talk to except for this computer and it’s sad.

i got a lot done today.

i’m better off alone anyways.

“enjoy the last moments of this rel. cuz buwagan na baya tika…”

Posted on by
1

and again, issa is sad because a certain boy has yet again succeeded at making her feel like shit. just like every other time. it’s amazing, actually, how in love i am with someone who has taken complete advantage of me. and i keep thinking it but i’m too scared to say it but i will just this once, it’s not even worth it anymore.

sorry james. but i don’t even know why i go through the trouble anymore.

“Our Battles”



Our battles are repetious

if not broken poetry

and maybe that’s the attraction

that you’re as self-absorbed as me



You jumped to the conclusion

and landed on my chest

Now how am I supposed to make you see.



I’ll just write this down

with hopes that you’ll understand

I can no longer be disciplined by

the frustration of an insecure man

And as I kiss your face you’ll know that

I can no longer apologize for

your former lover’s mistakes.



My past is mine to keep

Who are you to question me…?

Perhaps someday you’ll learn

Too bad

it’s not our turn

i am currently in love with this song because it’s everything i feel right now [or maybe even for a long time already].

i’m so frustrated with this relationship because it’s always my fault even when it’s not and i wanna cry about it but i’m not allowed to, i want james to know how i feel but i know he doesn’t care. i don’t even know why we are together because it’s not fun anymore. it always hurts. it always hurts.

i had lunch with arden today and kating caught up. it felt good to be around other people aside from james because i’m so suffocated by him. it felt good to know that my friends were living good lives and having fun and not going through the mess that i am.

i told grany that she and my aunt aren’t invited to my 18th. i haven’t gotten a reply since i sent the message at 8:30 this morning.

i got a perfect score on our finals for PE. And despite being constantly bitched at james for grouping with winster, i don’t regret sticking to my group cuz it was worth it.

i miss krystle a lot.

i don’t have anyone to talk to except for this computer and it’s sad.

i got a lot done today.

i’m better off alone anyways.

somehow, someday

Posted on by
Reply

everyday i feel like this is not exactly what i wanted. every time i feel like my best isn’t enough and you will never change even when i do. even why i have changed- you will still be the you that i despise.

despite the fact that i hate what you do to me and i hate that you treat me like shit, i just don’t know why i can’t get away from you. i don’t know why i can’t get you out of my system or why i just can’t get rid of you. you’re not even that great.

let’s let time discover one mystery at a time, shall we?

i gotta bounce. chiao

there are too many of us feeling the way we feel

Posted on by
Reply

i’m in the school library [as usual] and i’m currently feeling depressed because my one and only true addiction, triplejack, cannot be played in the library. i’m soo hooked on it now and as of the moment, life is at is dullest and it will forever be so until i get to play TRIPLEJACK again. haha.

i haven’t updated in a while since 1. there’s nothing to update you on and 2. because everything i want to blog about is banned by my boyfriend, the best boyfriend in the world, james. [did i tell you i’m a liar now?]

but yeah, school’s school. yk the drill. the only thing keeping me on my toes lately has been my 18th coming up very soon. ii’m excited. but i don’t wanna say the details right now so until the invitations are out, i’m keeping everything on the down low. lmao.

gtg. bye