baby let’s just blog our feelings away
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planet hate
i had to wake up this morning at 6 am. and i slept at 4.i know i was in bed by 3:30 but when you think, i’m supposing that this is natural. when i woke up, the onyl thing i saw was mommy starring over miguel and crying. and i was like, “wtf?! he’s fine. papa’s the sick one.” but yeah, i got her point. i told her that i cried to.i told her that i cried because of papa cuz i couldn’t see him sick because it’s killing me inside. like, i can’t eat, i can’t sleep and i don’t wanna talk. and there’s no one i wanna talk to either. i just wanna jog. jog, jog, jog. but the truth is, i didn’t cry just for him. i cried cuz of life.and again, nothing’s right and i find myself broken. i’ve never been the strong type. i was just wanna be in someone’s arms right now and cry. because this sucks. it sucks and nothing’s how it’s supposed to be.
hey, at least he’s still alive. but it hurts. i wish i was sick instead.no insecurities about that. rem., i like the attention. lmao.
as i am writting this little blog of my life, i’m on view my webcam on yahoo. chab’s the only one watching and she can see me cry. i hope she’s not paying attention though.but now i’m playing iwth a tiny piece of braided hair that i have no intentions of removing.
btw, doesn’t anyone FUCKING comment me anymore? lol. i’m amess. and i laugh about it.i’m a mess. i know.
kill me
kill me. you know you want to.
please
and once again
not again, issa. when do you ever learn?
and i’ll say it once again, this sucks.
i knew all along that this was going to happen but you know, you secretly wish it didn’t. but yeah, when i happens it’s the perfect time to swim, swim , swim and just pray that you drown and die. yes, i finally have a goal for tomorrow.
1 im not sleeping.
2 im swimming and i’ll be super tired
3 and i’ll die
4 and you’ll love me
i know that you look at her and you look at me and you just say to yourself, she’s not worth it. and the sucky part is, you’re referring to me. hahai. palauwaw lang gyud ka, you know that? lol. rem., we don’t cry on the outside anymore.
what the mother friker. hahai. i can’t take this but i thought i could. i had all the reasons and yet, i still feel bad. lol. im not planning to share cuz it isn’t worth sharring. it was my fault. putting myself out there like i was gonna be aryt. haha. bitch gyud ka, iss. di ka kibaw matagam. atay.
what am i gonna do?
no. i’m getting through this. i will. i am.
not.
and once again
not again, issa. when do you ever learn?
and i’ll say it once again, this sucks.
i knew all along that this was going to happen but you know, you secretly wish it didn’t. but yeah, when i happens it’s the perfect time to swim, swim , swim and just pray that you drown and die. yes, i finally have a goal for tomorrow.
1 im not sleeping.
2 im swimming and i’ll be super tired
3 and i’ll die
4 and you’ll love me
i know that you look at her and you look at me and you just say to yourself, she’s not worth it. and the sucky part is, you’re referring to me. hahai. palauwaw lang gyud ka, you know that? lol. rem., we don’t cry on the outside anymore.
what the mother friker. hahai. i can’t take this but i thought i could. i had all the reasons and yet, i still feel bad. lol. im not planning to share cuz it isn’t worth sharring. it was my fault. putting myself out there like i was gonna be aryt. haha. bitch gyud ka, iss. di ka kibaw matagam. atay.
what am i gonna do?
no. i’m getting through this. i will. i am.
not.
shine for me – shine for you – brighter and brighter
So this is how it goes
Well I, I would have never known
And if it ends today
I’ll still say that you shine brighter than anyone
Now I think we’re taking this too far
Don’t you know that it’s not this hard?
Well it’s not this hard [issa – yes, it is]
But if you take what’s your’s and I take mine
Must we go there?
Please not this time. No, not this time.
Well this is not your fault
But if I’m without you
Then I will feel so small
And if you have to go
Always know that you shine brighter than anyone does.
If you run away now,
Will you come back around?
And if you run away,
I’d still wave goodbye
Watching you shine bright.
I’ll wave goodbye
Watching you shine bright
(You shine bright, you shine bright)
I’ll wave goodbye tonight.
Well I, I would have never known
And if it ends today
I’ll still say that you shine brighter than anyone
Now I think we’re taking this too far
Don’t you know that it’s not this hard?
Well it’s not this hard [issa – yes, it is]
But if you take what’s your’s and I take mine
Must we go there?
Please not this time. No, not this time.
Well this is not your fault
But if I’m without you
Then I will feel so small
And if you have to go
Always know that you shine brighter than anyone does.
If you run away now,
Will you come back around?
And if you run away,
I’d still wave goodbye
Watching you shine bright.
I’ll wave goodbye
Watching you shine bright
(You shine bright, you shine bright)
I’ll wave goodbye tonight.
would you fuck him if he made you a big star?
sitting in front of this pc makes me think i’m blind. lol.
location:
internet cafe near celebrity performing arts studio
reason:
practice… for the WHOLE day. oh joy, oh joy!
anyways, yeah. i have practice from 8-12 today and 1-5. and then swimming trainning which i doubt i’ll go to. but i eventually will. and since i have no one to talk to here aside from my new found friend, i hope expect more little blogrings today. lol.
i’m having little flashbacks of your face and how good it felt being against your body and i even if it was all fun and games and even we both know it was wrong.. i’d still do it all over again.
papa’s in the hospital today. he got admitted last night cuz he had the chills 
he’s getting a colonscopy today i hope it gos well. casey was crying last night. she thought papa would die. i hope he doesn’t too. i’m scared for him. i just want him to get better. and plus, i want him to buy me that bag from nike. just playing. humor much, anyone?
haha. ‘m a distressed kidder. mock me.
so yeah, today’s all planned out for me. i don’t think i’ll be talking much. but when i’m here, i don’t think i ever really do. lol. i hope something stupid comes up like, people hanging out at the mall and i just randomly decide to go there with a big guitar and shit. haha. i know it’s stupid but, ok ra 
i love it
and yes, im finally sober. so i can talk more now. thank God, i remember. i don’t have a hang over either, oh yeah, i’m goood. lol. so, yeah. props to niña and arden for yesterday. the drunken bitches. and yes, nin, the sky is flat. and you did kiss someone amd you did puke and you did sleep in the car and we did steal your money so we could pay the taxi fair 
i love taking advantage
and yes, arden, you weren’t drunk. you were extremely tipsy. you did, however, sleep on the sand for a good hour and you did puke on carlow’s feet and you did act like a freain lunatic sa shower ranting about your “boo-boo”. leaving memories, carlo ha. joke. it was a coral,den. not carlo, i hope you know by now that there is a difference. lol. 
good times, ladies. good times.
bitches gyud mo!
what else? oh yeah. pau, tin, fran, i’m not sorry for bitting you kay bayot kay mo. gamay ra gyud kaau toh, swear. you guys are girls. lmao. and yeah, angie, i love you. bayot, i love you too. cry, i love you, bitch. alexa, i love you tons bayot, i love you, you fucking fuck! did i miss anyone? i love you too.
lagz, gi wakli ko nimo gahapon amawa ka. inutil! inutil! wa kai ayu. “iss, mu sumbong ko sa akong mommy kung pa imnun ko nimo!” mao bah? haha. mu sumbong pud ko nga you did something. pau, angayan ka ma mermaid. haha. martin, i love my bilbil. it’s my best friend. it’s my middle half. lol. inever knew you could have that. lol. franc, smoking after meals? typical. smoking while eating unya. carlo, i won’t tell na. promise.
ok, i just did that so i didn’t have to narate. it’s easier. much easier. lol.
girls: thanks for the food
boys: thanks for the drinks
issa: thanks for the plates and cups. but what about the spoon and forks you stupid bitch?!
paulo: thanks for dropping the barbeque! lol
and yeah. may 25, 2006. THANK YOU, MY FRIEND. THANK YOU 
i’m done for the moment.
bounce
issa prezz
kissing in the rain
the ever magical word for today is:
“pero, ok rana”
aye, sentence mana. whatever
“pero, ok rana”
aye, sentence mana. whatever
today was fun, fun, fun! like, disregarding the drama and everything.. but consider that one bit the cherry on top of a wonderful hapit na gyud intawn na human ang school year thing. huh? yeah.
anyways, i don’t think you all know this but, today was like our suppossed-to-be-big-but-ended-up-being-little-but-not-so-bad -end-of-summer beach thing.and yeah, duh. lingaw gyud oie.lol. ii’m eaving out te drama and the exact details. you’re never safe on the net. lol
anyways, ultimate camwhoring which will be posted on my multiply, issaplease.multiply.com and yeah. hehe
im stupid. and crazy. but *************************, baby. lol
update’s later. lo.
be back on thursday or friday. lav ya
issa – the wedding singer – not
saying what the freak sounds soo cool. i think i like it now
anyways, im back at the granny’s house again. ever since i got here, i’ve been online and that not a bad thing, in case you were wondering. i’m actually glad to be here for the first time in sucha loong loong time. lol. ever since i don’t know when, i’ve been deprived of using the pc at home. unless casey’s online and i get to sneak a few seconds on it. god, don’t you think there should be an age limit for when you can officially start invading the pc? hai nako. i swear. next thing you know, she’ll have her own xanga. this is trouble. invasion of public privacy much. lol. ok, you don’t have to understand that one. lol
anyways, hence, the title, i’m here so i can go straight to the make up place tomorrow. i secretly want them to shape my eyebrows like they did during prom. lol. so, i guess it isn’t much of a secret anymore now, is it. lol but yeah, for no good reason. haha. and i liked the way the shaped it last time. why am i talking about this? lol. superficial much?!
and yeah. i’m singing tomorrow. and i haven’t memorized the lyrics to the songs either. oh my. haha.
and oh yeah, im joinning a swimming competition on the 3rd. im scared though and i don’t think i wanna train anymore. i’m too lazy to. plus,i made plans. cooking on the 24th. guitar on the monday after that and baking again. and yeah, i kinda wanted to go to the beach with friends this thursday too. so, im kinda stuck but i can fit all those other stuff into trainning, right? i hope i can. i hope mom still says yes.
anyways, i’m watching zoey 101. this girl can sing. haha.
my days have been ok, iguess. i’e been doubtful here and there bur.. until further notice, i’, keeping it all to myself. not until i’m ready so yeah.
i want my own randy clein
issa
