An Open Letter To My College Self

Dearest eEesSuh (because this is how we USED to spell our name),

You are about to experience what will feel like the worst 4 years of your life but trust me when I say this: although a big part of this will still remain true in the future, it really wasn’t that bad.

Your college experience is going to be a lot different than what you had envisioned it to be because it will not be surrounded with lots of pretty rolls of cloth, tracing paper, draping or designing as you had originally wanted- instead, majority of you college years will be spent in a hair bun (kept together with A LOT of gel), a well-kept uniform, needles and sick people instead.

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I know the decision to take nursing over a fashion designing major is as far-fetched as far-fetched can get but the first thing you need to come to terms with is that you are not the only person who had to temporarily but their dreams on hold. The keyword here is temporarily.

As you get to know more people in your short time in college, you will eventually realize that 80% of your peers also share the same sentiments and whether it was because of pressure, the American dream or mere indecisiveness- you are not alone. This truth should teach you a lesson in perseverance amidst adversity which we will discuss more later on…

Right now it must feel like the world is not on your side and that nobody trusts your decisions or sees your true potential. Wrong. The people you love are looking out for you and in a way, they are even setting the bar higher for you. You might not appreciate it now, but when this is all over, you will. You really will. So instead of giving up, try taking this as a challenge and see how far you can go in a situation that you dislike. In other words, make the universe work in your favor. Join a club, audition for the dance troupe, sign up for the choir, run for officer, participate in class- succeed in the ways you’ve always succeeded when the odds were in your favor. Never let the light inside of you burn out because that’s always the one thing you’ve taken pride of in yourself- your passion, your heart, your dreams. There is no reason to stop being that person.

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Don’t be afraid to make new friends and stop hiding behind the thought that it’s pointless because you have nothing in common with anyone there. Remember that girl who you constantly catch drawing anime figures in her notebook instead of paying attention in class? Well, she eventually becomes an animator after this. Or that girl who always comes to class with a full face of makeup? She now owns a make up retailing outlet. Or what about that timid boy who secretly carries around a drawing book in his bag? He’s a designer now. And you, who constantly spent hours adoring clothes online or writing in her journal… you become so much more than your fears. There is so much more beyond the surface that you will never know of unless you get out of your comfort zone. Remember, people will surprise you and the same goes for yourself.

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The harsh reality is that you’re already here whether you want to be or not and quite frankly, giving up is not and has never been an option for you so you might as well enjoy the ride. The best thing you can ever get out of this is the lessons you’ve learned whether if it’s about human anatomy, taking care of a child, caring for the sick and even for the dead. These are all things that you are privileged to learn so get off your high horse and realize as early as now that these lessons will become useful for you one day. The day will come when someone you love will fall ill and that is the day you will look back and say, “I’m lucky to have learned this” and surprisingly, it will come sooner than you think. So digest every bit of information that you can after all, no one who has learned has ever lost.

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Another thing I would want to tell you is to always be kind to the people around you. Your teachers don’t want to spend their evenings at a hospital as much as you do- they’ve got families of their own, things they’d rather be doing, a life they’d rather be living rather than having to watch over a bunch of “kids” so keep that in mind the next time you throw a temper tantrum or decide to be snotty. Their jobs don’t define them as much as your college major does not define you. The bottom line here is respect.

There are a million of things I would like to talk to you about but 1 blog entry will never suffice so instead, we are going to outline a few important things to remember as we enter a new dimension. Please keep these following points in mind:

  • Always, ALWAYS back up your files. Take photos, scan and photocopy important documents and keep them in a safe place. You will appreciate this when you’re 4 months away from graduation and you lose your requirement notebook that took 2 years to comply. It’s not like you weren’t forewarned.
  • All-nighters rot your brain. Get some shut eye.
  • READ. Instructions, your books, your notes, messages- everything!
  • Invest in a good planner and organize your classes, activities, study periods and your personal breaks. College can be chaotic, learn how to conquer that warzone.
  • Do not attend class drunk or have someone sign your class attendance sheet ESPECIALLY if you’re not planning on attending that class on that day. Nuff said.
  • Take an initiative.
  • Learn how to enjoy the journey.
  • Make friends with the older kids, they are a Godsend!

Everyone says that college is one of the best times in a person’s life because this is the time where we get to explore, make mistakes and discover ourselves in the process. If you’re ever wondering about the adventures and the mistakes… well, you experience a million of them- fights, heartbreaks, terror teachers, horror stories, you name it! But it’s really the discovering part that makes it all truly worthwhile and let me tell you, you come out of this alive and kicking! So cheer up!

One of the most important lessons that you should constantly keep in mind whether you’re in college or clawing your way through the working world is to stop worrying about the future. Prepare for it, yes. Spend every waking minute stressing over what tomorrow may bring, no. Little girl, let the present worry about the present and the future worry about the future. You will eventually be able to do the things you said you’ve always wanted to do, not because the universe allows it but because you will never allow the universe to have it any other way. You just need to take it a day at a time.

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As a student, it is important to take time to understand your student loans. This way, you can be financially set up for the future. Always remember, there is always an opportunity to refinance your loans to fit your college graduate life.

All My Love,

Issa of 2016 (we spell our name like normal people now)

A Collection of Thoughts, Feelings and Explanations I Probably Don’t Owe Anyone But Myself

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Went back and forth on whether I should pursue uploading these OOTD’s from Singapore considering the fact that I had decided to cut ties with the people on this trip shortly after coming home. It might not be the best story to tell but what happened happened and I figured that if you’re not going to hear it from me, you’re going to hear it from someone else, so you might as well hear it from me.

So let’s talk.

In a nutshell, 2016 has been one of the weirdest years in my 26 years of existence. I feel like when the universe gives you something good, it also gives you something bad to keep you grounded and in my case, I definitely got the right mix of both and I don’t even know how I got by. This year was the first time I found myself jobless; almost homeless; boyfriend-less; (and what felt like) friendless and mistakenly family-less and if you’ve never been in this situation, lemme tell you- it f’in sucks! I guess everything in my world was crashing down on me and when you’re in a hole that deep, it’s hard to even be the slightest bit grateful or to recognize a blessing when it’s right there in front of you. Sure, I am exaggerating a tad bit- others definitely still had it worse. But I’ve always been quite sheltered so this was pretty bad.

So I decided to start my life all over again- new place, new-ish job, new boyfriend, new friends and a new perspective on life. I was so ready to just be a completely brand new person and forget everything in the past that ever hurt me and live a life anew. Problem. That’s not what life had intended for me… just yet.

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You see, we can have an image of who we want to be or who we want to become in our heads and we can try as hard as we can to be that person but when life says, “no, this isn’t what I want for you just yet”, you must be resilient.

I learned the hard way that you can try your best in something or with someone and still not have it be enough. And as much as I absolutely hate the thought of it, in actuality (and in my case), sometimes it’s not a bad thing. People might not believe in you or see the goodness of your heart, they may judge you instead of get to know you and when you decide that enough is enough- it is OK to pack up your bags and leave. I have no regrets.

Chapters, songs, meals and even life end, sometimes a little bit sooner than you expect but that doesn’t mean that you have failed. Their roles are just done in your life and so is yours in theirs. There really isn’t any use crying over it because if it was meant to last, it really would have. Unfortunately, life just really likes giving us things that hurt us sometimes. pffft. CURSES!! Totally kidding.

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My life used to revolve around relationships- boyfriends, friends, family but never with myself. There are so many things that I want to do but I always seem to hold them off because I become dependent on another person. I latch on to them so much that I become them and in the end, I find myself wondering who I really am to begin with. It’s taken a lot of not so sober nights and hard hitting conversations for me to realize this but I’m glad that I did anyways.

So for those who are so emotionally invested on my (love) life, here’s the real deal: I got my heart broken twice this year but you know what they say about heart breaks, it doesn’t just happen once or twice, it is a series of breaking and mending and then breaking again so I probably died 98711351356 times already. OK, I don’t actually know who says that about heart breaks but I felt like it added that dramatic effect so, yeah.

I am ok. I am really ok. So thank you for all the warm wishes!

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I don’t prefer talking about my personal life, which is why I am very selective about what I am posting in this blog entry. I hope you all understand that there are still some things that I would prefer to keep to myself and the little I am divulging has taken me a really long time before I actually decided to post this but like I said at the start of this post, I’d rather it come from me than from anyone else.

So as I bring this blog entry to a close, consider this a part of my letting go. I am letting go of all the things that hurt me, of all the things that people have said about me, of  everything that just wasn’t working in my life anymore and everything else.

I am grateful to those who stayed and came back and to everyone who has watched me just stand back, reevaluate my life and allowed me to concentrate on myself. Yesterday I watched a movie alone and it was awesome. Next week I’ll be traveling for work and as soon as I’m done publishing this entry, I’ll be getting ready to attend the Cebu Lit Fest- alone. It’s all very exciting, I tell you. I bought myself a hedgehog named Cotton and I have since them become obsessed with loving this pointy creature. I am enjoying the scent of my room, laundry, cleaning up and just sitting in silence.

So thank you to everyone, to the people I’ve met, to the people I’ve loved, to the person who constantly put up with me- thank you.

Those chapters, parallel dimensions, alter ego’s and weird phases are done now. I’m ready to come back home.

All my love,

Issa P.

An Open Letter To My 26 Year Old Self

Dear Issa,

At 26, you might be thinking that you are going through the hardest time of your life right now- you’ve gotten your heartbroken (and probably vice versa), you’ve constantly been trying to figure out where your place in this world is and you’ve asked yourself way to many times about “what is that one thing that is going to make you great in this world?”

You are still young, probably not as young as you once were or ever will be, but your heart and the things you love will always be your driving force whether you decide to blog, run a business, be a wife, a mother, a friend or simply a human being- and although you never feel like you are enough, you actually are.

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There are so many things in this life that you have yet to experience: loss of a loved one; debt and taxes; raising a child or worse, a teenager; a critical health condition and God knows what else, which means that there is so much more room for you to grow, learn and therefore become a better person.

Forgiveness is a trait that you must practice openly especially if you expect others to forgive you for your own shortcomings. A little lesson on people: lots of them will come and go in your life and if they are meant to be in it, God (or life) will find a way for them to come back- that is, if you want them to. But if you no longer want them there, the universe must have it’s reasons for that, as well. So learn and practice forgiveness even if sometimes you cannot forget but if you can, then you have been blessed with a graciousness like no other so never feel like you have sold yourself short. Again, you are enough.

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Always be careful with your words whether written, spoken or in thoughts. Same goes for your actions. There are some things that can never be unsaid or undone- you should know, you are constantly haunted by these things. So practice what you preach at all times.

Never let anyone make you feel less than you are especially when you are trying to be better. Never let anyone take you or the love you have to give for granted because you know yourself and your heart and you know what you deserve and when it is time to draw the line. Accept that it is OK to give up sometimes or to change your mind but do so with caution because there are things in this life that you can never take back.

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Write. Always write and never stop because that is something you are actually OK at. Your head is always so full of thoughts, ideas and feelings and they deserve a permanent place in this world- so give them the spot that it deserves. Remember, the goal is not to live forever but to create something that actually does.

Try to live a life of no regrats (yes, I know how I spelled it). Yes, you’ve lived a life full of mistakes but these mistakes have made you stronger and this strength will be useful one day- for yourself and for the people around you.

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I know it feels like being with someone, getting married and having kids are the most important things in your life right now but if it hasn’t or will not come for you yet, do know that if it is in God’s will then it will eventually come. Ironically, as you read this blog entry 20++ years later, you will scoff and say to yourself, “I don’t know why I was in such a hurry anyways. Being young and single was actually pretty great!” Remember, we never really know what we have until it’s gone so cherish every moment.

Never apologize for your choice of hair color, how you choose to live your life or for forgetting to remove your hair tie during photo shoots. Just do you and the goals you’ve set so highly for themselves will eventually materialize because you have the heart, drive, passion, dreams and you have never ever let yourself fall short. This is probably why you stress yourself out so much because you want things too much- that is ok. One day, everything will be OK.

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So as you live another year in this world, do know that you will survive. You’ve gotten through it so far so why should you ever stop trying now? People are living harder lives- ALWAYS BE GRATEFUL. Always thank God for the tribulations that He has faced you with because He has given them to you for a reason! (Thank Farrah for this reminder, ok?)

Again, you are enough even when the world or other people make you feel like you are not. You are enough and please stop thinking that you are not. Carry on with your dreams, your plans, your life- carry them for yourself and not for anyone else. Everyone will have their own opinions about you and even if they aren’t always pleasurable, they do not know what’s going on in your life just as much as you do not know what is going in theirs.

Never lose your fire and positivism even if it is SO EXTREMELY hard to do sometimes. You always have and you will continue to survive.

Happy belated birthday, you idiot!

Love,

Yourself

Getting Over My Slump

[Dress worn as top: H&M| Shorts: Tailor made| Flats: Tiny Ensembles| Bag: Nine West]

If I have periodic absences with my blog postings, it is not because I do not have anything to write about, it is simply because I do not want to. When I don’t post a selfie or my outfit of the day, it’s not because I don’t have anything to wear- I just do not want to have my photo taken. When I refuse to take my camera out and take product shots or film a vlog, it isn’t because I have run dry of ideas, I simply cannot find the willpower to do so. My personal notebook is filled to the brim with backlogs, content ideas and drafts which you will eventually see online, someday, but sometimes I find myself in a slump.

Slumps are difficult things especially in a world that requires us to be consistent, relevant & present. I find myself faced with this challenge more often than I would want but I am trying and finding out ways to conquer it. So here are a few ways that I get over my “slump” which I hope will be beneficial to you as well:

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1. Set goals

I always believe that goals should be SMART-  specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-bounded. I like to carry a notebook with me where I have written down my short and long term goals which I often take the time to look at, internalize, tick off and create new goals with. I find that these goals keep me inspired, excited and thirsty for life and at the same time, being able to achieve them gives me a sense of fulfillment. However, I constantly have to remind myself that some goals take longer than others to achieve which is why it is important to always count your blessings. Every single one.

Try setting daily, weekly, quarterly, yearly and life time goals but also remember that if you can’t achieve some of them, there are other mountains for you to conquer. Life has its reasons for not granting us everything we want… we’ll realize why in the right time. Hopefully.

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2. Set a routine

Nothing great happens simply sitting down, wishing and waiting for something to happen. I find that practicing a routine is effective in jump starting my day and in conditioning my brain to get things done. Try waking up at a specific time, stretching/ reflecting/ getting ready in the morning and accomplishing your daily set goals. If you can’t get everything done in one day, don’t beat yourself up about, tomorrow will come and you’ll have another chance at it. We don’t always win.

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3. Be contented with what you have

Contentment, I believe, is a crucial factor in staying motivated. I admit that sometimes I get impatient and anxious that I’m “not quite where I want to be at 25” but when I sit down to count my blessings, I come to realize that I am blessed beyond belief and that makes me OK. On my personal blog, I am trying to make it a practice to list down the things I am thankful for at the end of each day. I’ve only started writing it, but even just collating thoughts can be extremely helpful.

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4. Be ready for adversities

What would life be without a little trouble, eh? Arm yourself, toughen up and face challenges like a boss- storms will pass and the water will become clear again, it’s all about how you swim with or against it.

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5. Have a good support system

I used to think that I could do everything on my own and that if it was my own struggle, I had no right sharing it with others but it was when I was going what felt like the hardest time of my life that I realized how wrong I truly was and I regret doing it later than sooner. Friends, family and loved ones weren’t given to us just for the good times, they’re there for us even when we are at our worst and that is something that no one should take fore granted. Surround yourself with people who love you, motivate you and see the dreams and the good in your heart- they will bring out the best in you and possibly the fire you didn’t know you still had in you. Life can be pretty amazing, especially when you least expect it.

 

Whether you’re just being lazy, going through a quarter/ mid-life crisis or for whatever reason you have, do know that you’re not alone in this world. We all have those days and no one can judge you for that but your struggles can and will be conquered if you allow it to.

So keep on keeping on. You are loved!

xx,

Issa Perez

[VLOG] September Favorites

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPuvliy-KjY

My monthly favorite vlogs are finally back after 4 long months. Sorry, friends!

But anyways, help yourselves to the things that have kept me sane while I was gone.

Love you all,

Issa Perez

Becoming Blue (It Was Always More Than Just Hair)

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Psychology suggests that when a woman goes out of her way to make a significant change in their physical appearance, especially hair, it is a desperate attempt to take control of something or anything in their lives.

When I first started bleaching and dying my hair, I didn’t really put much thought into it except for the fact that 1. I was bored and 2. that I was never allowed to. When I finally got a thumbs up to coloring my hair, I admit I went into a full on rebellion and instead of getting a subtle light brown (that I knew would please my grandmother especially), I went crazy and jumped straight into attempting to achieve a grey, almost white hue. DSCF2178
DSCF2185I like to joke and tell people that I lost all sanity the moment I bleached my hair but it really is a lot more fact than it is fiction. Having feeling extremely lost and confused with the direction I was going in my life, I found that the simple yet extremely challenging decision of changing my hair color was in fact very liberating and it allowed me to take control of my life. So in retrospect, I had to lose myself completely in order to be found and it was in simple things like changing my hair color where I had chosen to begin this journey. In a way, I felt like if I could change the color of my hair then I could definitely change the things I wanted to in my life and unknowingly, I started to do just that.Hair cuts, extreme hair transformations, break ups and new beginnings all go hand in hand and I would be lying if I said it wasn’t happening to me. I hate to be the cliche but it was the cliche that I needed and with every hue that my hair had become, I felt like I was gaining control of my life slowly but surely. I was gaining my confidence back, I was starting to regain hope and most of all, I had started looking forward for what was in store for me- just a few things I thought I had lost completely.

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It was no coincidence that I had chosen to go blue the moment that I did. It was actually something that I had put a lot of thought into, it was something I had prepared myself for and it was something that I used to signify a certain moment in my life. It was me quietly telling the world that I was ready to be blue and not the sad kind but the blue that is responsible, secure with herself, confident and finally, peaceful.

I may not be there quite yet and just because I change my hair again doesn’t mean I’ve stopped trying to be that person but it’s simple gestures like this that ignite my fire. It’s me putting thoughts into actions and telling the universe that this is who I will be and if this doesn’t make sense to you then we can’t be friends. Just kidding. I’m weird in lots of ways and I don’t expect you to get on my level but since this is MY blog, I will go ahead and write what I want.

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At the end of the day, it’s just hair and it grows back eventually. And if you can’t even change the color of your hair, then what else can’t you change?

Life is all about change so you either stick to what you’re comfortable with or you roll with the punches. I’m just trying not to knock out while trying to look good doing it. har.

I’m Blue da ba dee da ba daa,

Issa Perez

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Better Vision with Sunnies Specs @ SM City Cebu

Sunnies by Charlie has upped their eye wear game by shifting from their super cool sun glasses collection to a brand new prescription eye wear line named Sunnies Specs. Because of Sunnies byCharlies’ nationwide popularity, many customers wanted to not only just own fun and quirky sunglasses but eyeglasses as well, which is how this line came to be. This new line of prescription eye wear which took months to develop is design- driven, user- centered and easy on the pocket. It’s a simple process of getting the frame you want, a free eye exam and same- day service all for just P 1,999.00!Here’s a quick view of my favorite pieces from their collection:listHere are a few photos from the launching of Sunnies Specs at The Pig & Palm a couple of weeks ago:DSCF1941//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js
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Make sure to check them out at SM CITY CEBU ,Upper Ground Floor, North Wing SM Cebu,

For more information, check out their official website

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I can see clearly now,

Issa P.

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