god james, i love you and everyone knows that. everyone knows how i always put you above myself and everyone else but there were so many times when you hurt me and you made me feel like a piece of shit. it’s ironic though because when you weren’t putting me down, you always made me feel more than i was. but that doesn’t matter now.

i know i really hurt you. i know i wasn’t there to make you feel better when you really needed me. and i know that i could vey easily take those words back but somehow, i don’t want to. only because i’m scared. i’m scared that if i do, you’ll hate me more because i promised us that we would never ever break up.and is was the one who ended things with us. i’m scared that if we do get back together, i’ll screw up even more and it’ll just seem like we never broke up.

because at 5:49 of june 7, 2008, we officially ended things. but that doesn’t mean that i don’t picture out my life without you because i know what i want in life and that’s you. and this doesn’t mean that just because we aren’t together right now means we can’t still be together in the future. right?